I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
