yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."�
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
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