thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
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