pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize
