she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Fuck appropriateness.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Randomize
