...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Randomize