Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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