is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
Randomize