I cockslap morals
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Randomize
