I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
