I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
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