it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
