i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
