East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
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