so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Randomize
