Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Randomize
