I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize
