i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize