Screwed.edu
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Randomize
