I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
This is classic penis vs brain.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
