Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
Someone signed my nipple.
Randomize
