I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Randomize
