I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
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