i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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