God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
Randomize