So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Randomize
