My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
