A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
He's on the porch naked. Help.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
