Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
she told me i tasted like america
How's work?
Spinning.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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