STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Randomize
