so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Randomize
