A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Randomize
