I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
This is my gift to your gina
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
Randomize
