I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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