That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
