even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Randomize
