I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize
