We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
