Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
The uberlube is also flammable
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
