Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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