love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize
