I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
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