You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
