found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
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