This girl is more easily done than said...
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
