i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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