Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Randomize
