how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Randomize
