you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
