Sry I called you an 8
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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